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Woman Does What Any Upstanding Citizen Would Do, Calls Cops on the Sun

 

Florida was getting too…normal. Now this isn’t something you see every day (unless of course you frequently step outside), but thankfully a Tampa, Florida woman wasn’t having any of that shit and decided to get in touch with authorities because she thought mother nature was acting a bit sketchy. Let the record show that I don’t like narcs or anything they stand for, but the ring around the sun WAS black so I can understand why her immediate reaction was to phone the police. Had it been white it probably would’ve just asked her if she remembered to file her taxes this month.

 

 

Luckily for the cops, this woman has a vast knowledge of what has and hasn’t “neva’ been in the United States of America” before… neva’ eva’, and she was able to give the cops a pretty accurate description of the culprit. Tampa PD obviously knew they had to act quick before this bastard struck again so they brought in a sketch artist to draw up a profile.

 

If any of you Florida stoolies out there see the criminal, be sure to contact your local police department. They can use all the leads they can get.

 

-Brian

 

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